Wednesday, May 17, 2017

The Holidays

115


My mother never worried about the holidays when it was just me and her yet, since the time she fractured her pelvis, she suddenly cared about them and wanted to take me out for my birthday and Thanksgiving and Christmas. This creeped me out as it was so unlike her and I didn't know what to make of it.
Fortunately I had excuses at many of these times. As Daina would often be taking me out to eat anyhow, she had roped me into annually going out to eat at a restaurant where the meal was free for the one having the birthday. She sold it as a kindness to her as it saved her money, I only agreed as long as the restaurant didn't make a show of it. It turned out they didn't like doing the clapping and singing either, if they didn't have to. Daina had also found a couple of places that would be open on Thanksgiving Day and Christmas and invite me to go with her, rather than sitting in my apartment eating ramen noodles. But with Nineteen Ninety-Three Daina couldn't make these holidays anymore as she wanted to spend them with her own mother.
Daina's mother had been recently diagnosed with lung cancer and, as it had been caught so late, it was already past the time to treat it beyond an attempt at chemotherapy and painkillers as the cancer spread. Given this, Daina had a reason to be back in Denver for the Holidays and spend time with her mother and I didn't begrudge her that. Unfortunately this meant my ready excuse to turn down the invitations to join my own mother for the holidays was gone. When she again called me for this year's Thanksgiving, I debated quietly having ramen noodles in my apartment or going out to eat even if it did include spending time with my mother...
As she had been better behaved since her fractured pelvis, and I had become used to eating out so frequently, I decided to agree and it turned out we had a very good time. After we were done eating, mother offered to have me take the wheel of her car and go for a 'drive around town or to the mountains' for the afternoon. Enjoying such drives myself, I agreed and we were soon into the mountains and running along the back roads. After a couple of hours of this, it was time to head back and go our separate ways. For Christmas we did the same thing, though given the declined weather we kept the after dinner drive to around town.
This would become an annual event for my mother and myself for the next few years and they added to the rare positive experiences I had with her during my life. While she had made a number of friends during her early years in Colorado, her penchant for always having to degrade everyone in conversation had resulted in those friends eventually avoiding contact with her and, as I was the child who had helped her when she had fractured her pelvis, I suspected she saw me as her only friend left in town. In reality, after everything she had put me through I could never be her friend. But I could be polite and have fun with her as long as we didn't spend too much time together, allowing her typical behaviors to resurface.
With the holiday season coming to an end, the normal routine of life returned and I asked Daina how her mother had been doing during her recent visits. It turned out she was now confined to a rental hospital bed in the first floor of their house. Daina found it bizarre that given how terrible the relationship between her father and mother had been when she had grown up, her father had become dedicated to helping and caring for their mother during this time and she wondered if he had any regrets over the way he had treated her during their lives, or if he was just doing it out of duty. Either way it had helped a lot as many of Daina's siblings had moved away and Daina said she and her younger brother couldn't handle it on their own as they didn't live in Denver, themselves.
With the turn of the year came my last two semesters of College. In fact it would be my last full semester of College and then an abbreviated summer semester with a single class to ready me to join the job market. After all the challenges of my childhood and all of my early adult ordeals, I could see the end coming to this part of my story and would finally have my chance to enter the mainstream of life.




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